The Last Summer in My 40s: The Bucket List, Checked Off

This was the summer before I turned 50, and I made a bucket list.

I didn't want a countdown to 50. I wanted a list. So I made one, and I spent the summer working through it. All summer, I called it the last summer in my 40s.

Chicago, with my daughter

We took the train to the Obama Presidential Center with no tickets and no plan, after donuts and the Bean. I got to watch my daughter take it in. When I walked in, I saw HOPE, and it stopped me. I remember where it all started.

Jay-Z at Yankee Stadium

I went with my best friend. I grew up in Brooklyn listening to Jay-Z, so I had to be there. It was going to be an iconic show, and I didn't want to miss it. I had never seen him in concert.

So what better way to kick off my birthday summer bucket list?

Charleston with my siblings

Our annual tradition. I'm the oldest of five, and a few years ago we started meeting up once a year, no matter how far apart we live or how busy we are. Three days in Charleston this year. It's the closest I get to Friday nights at granny's.

The night that stood out was game show night. We really enjoy playing with each other.

Jill Scott in Philly, with my best friend

We're both fans, so this one was special. Jill Scott is my favorite artist, and I love experiencing moments like this with my best friend. She lives in Philly, and I flew in just for the show. One night that felt like a week.

What made it so good was that Jill Scott didn't allow phones. Everyone was present, and everyone was on their feet singing every song. It felt like sisterhood. Warm and cozy. The band, her voice, no notes.

Then Jill Scott hearted a Reel I made about it.

Usher and Chris Brown, with my mom and friends

It was really good to see my mom enjoy a concert for the first time. She has worked so hard, and I want her to enjoy her life. Whatever experience she wants, I want to give it to her.

After this many shows in one summer, I figured something out: going to a concert is like going to the club. Jill Scott didn't allow phones, and the room felt like sisterhood. At Jay-Z we had our phones, and it still felt the same, because you're in a room full of people who love the music as much as you do. You get to see your favorite artist and sing along with all their fans, at the top of your lungs. It's one of my favorite things now.

The last item: a beach, alone

The list ended with Rosemary Beach, and it was the only stop I did by myself. After four trips with people I love, I wanted one with nobody to perform for. White sand, blue water, and nobody's schedule but mine. I watched the sunset every single night. No agenda. Just me, recalibrating for whatever's next.

What a list does

I thought I was making a bucket list for my birthday. Looking back at it now, it's more like evidence: a summer where I kept showing up for the things I'd been putting off.

What's still on your list? Tell me in the comments.